In American schools, bullying is often as common as pop quizzes and uncomfortable plastic chairs. Yet seemingly harmless, juvenile taunts may lead to anxiety and depression, drug use or even violence.
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In the October issue of American Behavioral Scientist, Bridgewater State College professor Elizabeth Englander suggests a novel approach: Prevention programs could treat bullying behavior not merely as a conflict between children, but as a hate crime.
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The programs they choose often lack research to back up their effectiveness. University of Toledo professor Lisa Kovach, for example, described an “expert” who travels to Ohio schools, charging close to $1,000 per hour for a program unsupported by scientific evidence.
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http://miller-mccune.com/main/article/132
Treat bullying as a hate crime?
By SwampBubbles - Posted on January 9th, 2008
I do think that schools need to take bullying very seriously but I don't think it should be categorized as a hate crime because I'm afraid of the hard line schools would tend to take with it.
Soon you'd see kindergardners arrested for a hate crime because they pushed someone down on the playground.
While I'm not suggesting that the child shouldn't be corrected, it certainly shouldn't be listed as a crime, and there probably are older kids would should be charged with a hate crime for the bullying that they do. I just don't trust the schools to be able to make that distinction.
After all having an tylenol in your pocket can get you busted for having drugs in school so the idea of them taking such a zero tolerance policy to the outer limits isn't outside the realm of possibility.
Conflict is as old as the universe. In fact it's how people respond to conflict that has advanced society further along and encouraged learning.
So do I think bullying should be a hate crime? No. I think parents are doing a much more lousy job today teaching their kids how to respond to bully's than ever before.
MikeyA
MikeyA
I think parents are doing a much more lousy job today teaching their kids how to respond to bully's than ever before
I'm really interested in your answer to this problem (and it is a problem).
FYI, we'll probably agree.
Many don't teach their kids how to stand up for themselves.
Some encourage their students to only turn to administrators and teachers. While this may be effective sometimes it doesn't always end it. If it still occurs the kid will grow up feeling no one will help them. They then grow resentful.
Others talk to the parents which tends to bring more wrath upon them.
Others encourage their children to fight. This will end them being bullied but often does create another bully. When a child learns they can impose their will by force on others even if it's to stop being imposed upon they carry the lesson over into other aspects of their life where they become the bully and the cycle starts over.
I learned that this is a complicated dynamic. I was told by my parents to always stand up for myself but also that fighting would be punished harshly.
The lesson I learned was if I did need to defend myself to strike first, hard, and only to be effective. I would be punished but the reputation I gained as able to defend myself would end the bullying. I was involved in two fights my whole time in school. My first where I was bullied and beat up. The second where I came up on the bully and hit him unexpectedly. The surprise alone I think was enough to prevent him from bullying me again. I was punished for both fights but only the second stopped me from being bullied.
MikeyA
MikeyA
but let me just say it's shocking how much bullying goes on, during school hours, on the playground. A supervised playground.
My 10-year-old has been bullied on occasion, both verbally and physically. All kids are taught to go to a teacher or playground supervisor if they're being bullied. That's fine for younger kids, kindergarten to maybe 4th or 5th grade. After that, I agree they must stand up for themselves.
The problem is if they fight back after being bullied they're also likely to get a 3-day suspension for fighting, no matter who may have caused the situation.
I detest bullies and believe they're the scum of the earth. I've told my son to never, ever start the trouble, but to stand up for himself and if he gets pushed or hit to push or hit in return. I'll accept the consequences.
Kooz is right on with his post. It's the parents of children who feel they must intimidate and control others who allow the problem to manifest itself.
TPS will punish your child if he or she defends themselves or they will reduce the punishment on the other child.
I know this because my daughter in junior high was pushed against the wall by a boy who then grabbed her breast, she did exactally what I'd taught her and kicked him in the balls. She wasn't punished but the kid wasn't expelled for his sexual attack on her because she kicked him.
I told her school admin that the only thing my daughter did wrong was that the boy was still able to stand up when she was done kicking him.
The kid never touched her again.
He's damn lucky I didn't press charges on him, something I've often kicked myself for.
The point is, teaching a child to stand up for themselves is a good thing but sadly they also learn that they will be punished for standing up for themselves by the very people who should be protecting them and keeping them safe while they are at school.
I agree with TPS's no tolerance towards fighting even if it is standing up for yourself or retaliation. I only have a problem when they don't suspend both parties because so often times it's hard to actually know who the bully is.
I have a very dear friend whose child was involved in a fight. The child told her he was being bullied at school and naturally she took her child's side. In the end it turned out her son was the one doing the bullying. She felt her son made her feel like a fool and I have no doubt his punishment was even more severe because of it.
MikeyA
MikeyA
"I think parents are doing a much more lousy job today teaching their kids how to respond to bully's than ever before."
And relying on government intervention CERTAINLY wont do a thing to stop it.
Parents nowadays are doing a lousy job of teaching kids how to deal with bullying. However, they're doing a worse job of teaching their (future bullies) how to respect others and not bully in the first place.
with your post. The parents of bullies set the table for their kids' actions.
Neither the parents nor the school teaches the children not to verbally or physically abuse each other. The school could be teaching this kind of thing, and refuses. Then again, look at the teachers and the administrators. Larry Sykes comes to mind.
My congratulations to Mr. McCaskey for the excellent job he's doing with his son. Most parents don't do half that well. My only hope is that your son learns to fight boys bigger than he is, mainly because that's what he'll be up against, and because if he learns how he'll win.
Reporting abuse to a school teacher is a lot like reporting an assault to the police. The alleged perpetrator will simply deny it, and spend a few nights in jail at the very most. It's likely that the case will never go to trail. Of course if you defend yourself, you'll be arrested and charged with assault with a deadly weapon, possibly with a gun specification. If a misguided honor student breaks into your home, you have a duty to retreat. If you choose to ignore that duty and shoot the little so-and-so, you'll be arrested, charged, indited, etc.
So I would guess that the school system is only trying to prepare your child for the society he'll have to deal with when he turns 18.
Is this a sad state of affairs or what?
Mad Jack
Mad Jack's Shack
Maybe it's better that they learn this world isn't fair and you need to work for anything you want instead of expect it being given to you.
I'm not really commenting on the situation here I'm just thinking out loud.
MikeyA
MikeyA
I don't want my kid fighting, under any circumstances, really.
But it's worse if he, or any kid, goes through life being subjected to intimidation and harrassment by other kids.
But, if kids fight back, in any school setting, they will be subjected to the same repercussions as the kid who's lack of respect toward others created the problem.
KINDERGARTEN - Sammy begins his school career a happy and much loved little boy. He loves his class and has fun with his new classmates. One day during play, he innocently steals a kiss from one of his little female friends. -- SUSPENDED/EXPELLED -- ZERO TOLERANCE FOR SEXUAL CRIMES!!!
4TH GRADE -- Sammy, playing soccer at school has a fall and sprains his ankle. Fortunately it's not a bad sprain, and he's back in school a day or so later with a pair of crutches, an ace bandage, and a recommendation from his doctor to take an over the counter anti-inflammatory for the pain. His parents put some ibuprofen in with his lunch food, and per doctors advice, he takes it at lunch time. -- SUSPENDED/EXPELLED -- ZERO TOLERANCE FOR DRUG USE!!!
7TH GRADE -- Last night Sammy's family had a cookout. Sammy who packs his own lunches, spy's a left over piece of steak and decides he wants to take STEAK to school so he can have some fun strutting his stuff in front of his friends who always just have PBJ's. He brings silverware to cut the meat. -- SUSPENDED / EXPELLED -- ZERO TOLERANCE FOR WEAPONS!!!
SOPHOMORE YEAR -- Sammy is continually verbally bullied by Seth, a known bully who pretty much says and does what he wants. One day the verbal stuff escalates and Seth pushes Sammy into the lockers. Sammy's parents - having had to deal with finding him new schools three times now, go against their better judgment and tell Sammy to report Seth to the principal. (rather than just telling Sam to give Seth the knuckle sandwich that would have taken care of the problem). Seth is SUSPENDED / EXPELLED and is awaiting hate crime litigation which if found guilty will most likely pull him from his parents home and put him into juvie hall.
SOPHOMORE YEAR, A FEW WEEKS LATER -- Sammy, now branded a wimp, a narc, and a pussy, has been ostracized and shunned by his classmates. He brings his dad's gun to school and blows some people's heads off.
Local cradle to grave advocates scratch their heads and form committees to determine what more laws they can enact so that this tragedy will never happen again.
SOPHOMORE YEAR, A FEW WEEKS LATER
Something about this entry made me laugh out loud. Anyway, that's a good post.
We used to have a dog named Sammy. He was an excellent dog.
Mad Jack
Mad Jack's Shack
I don't want my kid fighting, under any circumstances, really.
Considering the temperate, kind and thoughtful nature of his father...
::MadJack ducks::
Mad Jack
Mad Jack's Shack