I thought this was a breaking news and political blog...

Seriously, nothing personal, but I could give a shit less about fat monkeys and soccer playing goldfish. Chris, I hope you clean this stuff up, or you can drop me off the list of members to this site.

Illinois smoking ban tamps down puffing at pipe convention

ST CHARLES — There will be no indoor smoking at a large convention for pipe smokers in Illinois.

A new Illinois law bans smoking in public places. That's taken some of the steam out of this weekend's Chicagoland International Pipe & Tobacciana Show in St. Charles.

BREAKING NEWS!!!!! Florida moves to ban Truck Balls

TALLAHASSEE, Florida -- The Florida Senate today debated and passed an amendment to impose a $60 fine on Truck Nutz, the novelty vehicle adornment attached to trailer hitches that resemble the dangling southern end of a northbound bull.

Woman, 75, gets phone call about her funeral arrangements

METHUEN — Rose Griffin is not dead, so the call from someone trying to arrange her funeral was a bit of a shock. The Methuen woman got the call at a late hour Friday night from someone looking for her son, who was not there.

When an irate Griffin used her caller ID to call back, the man informed her he was a funeral director trying to make arrangements for her son's dead mother.

Lucas County Dog Warden Warns of Escalating Dog Bite Numbers

A 13-year old West Toledo boy suffered puncture wounds and a broken arm this week due to a pit bull attack. The injuries required surgery. The boy also suffered lacerations to his ear. This is just one of a recent rash of dog bite incidents that increase as the weather gets warmer.

Chilean town giving free Viagra to senior citizens

SANTIAGO, Chile (AP) - A working class suburb of Chile's capital began handing out free Viagra to senior citizens on Wednesday. Lo Prado Mayor Gonzalo Navarrete said he launched the program because "an active sexuality improves the overall quality of life."

Saudi governor orders haircuts for men who hit on women

RIYADH, Saudi Arabia (AP) - A governor in northern Saudi Arabia has ordered authorities to punish men who flirt with women in public places by cutting their hair, local media said Tuesday.

While gas prices rise and many Toledoans are suffering, Bush stammers around like the village idiot.

Follow the link to watch the video - the guy can't even speak in complete sentences, it’s scary that this guy is leading the free world. Though in fairness the world has pretty much written him off as the village idiot that he is.

The Pot Vending Machine Has Been Stolen by the Feds!

Remember the recent report about a medicinal marijuana vending machine opening in Los Angeles?

Pot vending machines take root in Los Angeles Machines distribute the drug to people with cards authorizing use

LOS ANGELES - The city that popularized the fast food drive-thru has a new innovation: 24-hour medical marijuana vending machines.

Patients suffering from chronic pain, loss of appetite and other ailments that marijuana is said to alleviate can get their pot with a dose of convenience at the Herbal Nutrition Center, where a large machine will dole out the drug around the clock.

Bull market in gold creates a strong demand for old dental work

NEW YORK - Dazzled by the bull market in gold, people are digging through drawers for old dental caps, fillings and bridgework they saved years ago and selling them at prices that would make the tooth fairy blush.

Stretched to thin

City and County leaders. Lets finish one project at a time. Let us see if the public will support these projects before spending us into a hole we can not recover from.

Md. officials propose rationing inmates' toilet paper

ROCKVILLE, Md. (AP) - Labor leaders are recommending that Montgomery County ration toilet paper for inmates to help save costs. The request comes as council members try to resolve a $297 million budget deficit.

The president of the union that represents Montgomery County government employees has given council members a six-page memo of recommended budget cuts suggested by some of the workers.

Godfather-style horse's head left for politician

A horse’s head has been found outside the office of an Italian politician, in a scene reminiscent of The Godfather.

An anonymous call alerted police to the macabre discovery which outside deputy mayor Vincenzo Pomes’ office in Osturni, near Bari. Mr Pomes, a centre left politician, said: “There is no explanation for such a stupid act.

Godfather-style horse's head left for policeman

Adolf Hitler dolls to go on sale

Adolf Hitler dolls to go on sale in Ukraine

A toy manufacturer in the Ukraine has made headlines by announcing it will sell dolls of the former German dictator Adolf Hitler.
# How About That?: Weird news from around the world

The 16in figurine - complete with moveable arms to reproduce Hitler's infamous salute - will first go on sale in the capital Kiev, local media reported.

Love motel for dogs

A love motel in Soa Paulo has opened for amorous dogs. The love motel offers decorated rooms for dogs of pet owners who are concerned for their animal's needs.
Robson Marinho, owner of a pet shop, built the air-conditioned room on the second floor and hung a sign that reeds "Pet Love Motel".

Lynchings in Congo as penis theft panic hits capital


KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.

Brazil priest carried aloft by party balloons disappears

SAO PAULO, Brazil - A Roman Catholic priest who floated off under hundreds of helium party balloons was missing Monday off the southern coast of Brazil.

Rescuers in helicopters and small fishing boats were searching off the coast of Santa Catarina state, where pieces of balloons were found.

Olympic torch relay evokes memory of Australian hoax

SYDNEY (AFP) - The arrival of the troubled Olympic torch relay in Australia next week will revive memories of a 1956 stunt in which a hoax runner fooled crowds with a homemade torch topped by flaming underpants.

Teensy thief crawls in mail flap

VIENNA (Reuters) - A thief broke into the headquarters of Austria's ruling political party by wriggling through a post flap in the front door, a party official said on Friday.

The burglar squeezed through the 35x35cm hole early on Thursday and stole laptops, mobile phones, notebooks and cash before crawling out, Catherina Straub, spokeswoman for the Social Democrats, said.

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